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This year between buying a new house and having a new baby there have been so many emotional highs and lows Henry and I have had some real doozies for fights. In an effort to change current unhealthy patterns we recently decided to do something drastic. Henry has not been all that pleased with his employment in sales and he has looked in other fields where he would be more likely to flourish (teaching), but hasn’t been able to make the transition. Besides having an intrinsic ability to teach others easily he also is a pretty great writer. In November we decided that it would be best for us if Henry ends his employment, I work more, and Henry focuses on teaching our boys, blogging and looking for a career to help him grow. Even though I would like to stay home with our kids in the future, right now we both feel surprisingly content with this decision.
One surprising effect of this choice has been that we have both relaxed a little in our approach with one another. It is naturally very stressful to try and coordinate two working schedules in order to minimize the need for child care and try to maximize our income to pay off debt. You can imagine the frustration. And Henry thinks my obsession with Swagbucks is a bit ridiculous, but hey…we are $80 richer than we were two months ago! I did manage to convince him that Ebates was worth signing up for and he made $5 plus his purchase rebate. But since we decided to change our circumstances and do what we feel is best for our family, we are happier and more appreciative of each other. And I have noticed a few very sweet things Henry has recently done to show his affection for me.
- He cleaned the bathroom.
Yup. I came home after a 15 hour day to a freshly cleaned bathroom. And I didn’t even have to ask/instruct/nag at him to do this. Awesome.
2. “What do you need me to do?”
I had a really random schedule this week (night shift makes you do crazy things) and in order to help me get some sleep before going in at 1am Henry came home after work and immediately asked for a chore list so I could go to sleep. I was very thankful.
3. Bought me my favorite Chapstick.
I sent Henry to the store to buy feminine products (maybe that should be a winning point too!) and he very sweetly came home with all the right products and a strawberry flavored Chapstick.
4. He left the light on.
I was really looking forward to going to our work Christmas party the other night so when he got home from work he sent me out the door to go to the party. And he very kindly put a battery-operated candle on our end table in the living room so I could see my way to our room when I arrived home. I thought this was very sweet and thoughtful.
5. He volunteers with the youth group.
Every other Wednesday night Henry heads off to church to teach kids about Jesus. It is one of his favorite times because he gets to tell kids about the promises of God, he gets to teach, and he gets to play his guitar. It is fantastic to see him do things he loves. This week was great because I actually was able to go with him. Our church does this very cool event called the Christmas Village Toy Store every year. It provides an opportunity for families to buy brand new toys at discounted prices to enjoy for Christmas. All the money that is spent is reinvested in the community. To pull off a successful event it takes a great deal of man power so we took the boys and volunteered our time this week to help the event succeed. It was really great for me to see him interacting with the youth and being an example of what it means to give back to your community.
I have really enjoyed looking for ways that Henry has tried to show me his affection recently. So often I get caught up in all the things he doesn’t do that it was refreshing for me to shift my perspective and appreciate his kindness.
How has your significant other showed you how much they love you?